Armed Robber Escapes with Sex Doll

I love the way that headline makes it sound like the doll was his partner..., um, I mean moll. I have this image of the doll driving the getaway car.

I also enjoy the subtext of surprise that those things are so expensive.

You know the politicians have fled when this qualifies as a headline.

I ponder the significance of specifying that it was an Iowan who was accused of an attack with a toy monkey. Does this mean we are back to observing only our own (even if they come from a faraway place like Des Moines)? Or is it shock that an Iowan would do such a thing, implying that all those strange people running around the state because of the caucuses have lowered our moral standards?

I was a bit disappointed Santorum didn't actually win, until I realized the subject line is now a viable headline in family papers.

Also, Attack Newt!

Okay, as a way to run a government, this is shameful. As theater, it's more fun than a really good production of Noises Off.

Well, our caucus was boring. There were more people than I expected, and I wound up working to sign people in and register a handful of new voters. I have been drafted to attend the county convention, but may pass that job off to an alternate. Obama called in live, but I was busy sorting the sign in forms and just listened from outside the door with half an ear.

Mostly M:TNG-2 and I were disappointed no OWS people showed up.

Then I got home to find out that Santorum is in the lead on the Republican side. I can't stop laughing.

I still find it hard to believe he'll win Iowa, but I've been looking at the maps, and many of the uncounted votes are in rural counties, which are going for Santorum. He's getting more competition from Bachmann and Perry in those areas, so if he loses them it won't be because Romney beat him.

Romney is getting the urban counties, except for the university towns, which are going for Ron Paul. Gingrich has gotten two counties so far, which isn't great considering there are 99 counties in Iowa.

Earlier in the cycle, I'd chat with someone who wanted to know if I preferred Santorum (ick) or argue with a caller who refused to tell me who commissioned their blatantly biased push poll. It gets old fast, and I don't pick up the phone much right before a caucus unless the caller ID tells me it's someone I know. But the robocalls go to the answering machine. I just listened to a swill-load of smarm from Gingrich, who invited me to call him.

Usually I roll my eyes, but this one made me laugh. 1-855-ASK-NEWT sounds too much like a pet store hot line, or maybe a pitch from an insurance company whose mascot is going eyeball to eyeball with the gekko.

Just four more days, and they'll all go away.

Rick Perry must have spent a fortune to get this ad on the air in Iowa, because I can't flip a channel without seeing it. It's well on its way to becoming the most disliked video on YouTube, and I encourage you to listen for as long as you can and record your own reaction there.



Right now, all anyone is hearing about Iowa is how well hateful, right-wing politics is playing here. That's because only the Republican nomination is up for grabs. The nature of the caucus system means that only people willing to drag themselves out in freezing weather and spend a few hours in an elementary school gym arguing and shuffling around participate. Which means that the system is skewed to the more extreme end of the Republican base, the kind of people who still haven't figured out that gay marriage is no threat even though it's been legal here for years and the only documented effect is a slight bump to the economy because of the people coming in from out-of-state to get married.

The kids in this video are more representative of the Iowans I meet every day:

Okay, If I think about it, I do know what happened. In bullet form, like the tech writer I used to be

• Went to New Orleans at the very end of October and met with M-TNG-1, who is working in Louisiana
• Visited Marie Leveau's tomb and some spooky graveyards on Halloween day
• Sat in a nice restaurant on Bourbon street that night, watching Halloween in NOLA pass us by (yes, I know most of that was still October, but by bedtime it was November)
• Stayed for a week at a turn-of-the-last-century hotel, sightseeing
• Petted a baby alligator in a swamp
• Discovered work had gotten even more backed up than usual, leading to more overtime than usual
• Got surprising call from contractor saying he could probably get my new kitchen cabinets installed by Thanksgiving if I could empty every blessed thing out of the room right away
• Spent 5 nervous days with no kitchen sink, wondering if he really could
• Had all my helpers at work pulled for another project (hardly a novel occurrence)
• Almost fainted with shock when new cabinets and counter tops were installed just before Thanksgiving
• Managed to get the kitchen into a useable condition
• Spent a wonderful long weekend with Jwaneeta, M:TNG-2, and two of TNG-2's college friends
• Worked yet more overtime and somehow managed to make project goals by the end of the month

I just received an email from a Christian organization with the statement below. I find it hard to believe such an uptight group would make this pun intentionally, but almost as hard to believe that they could miss it.

'A coalition of military chaplain endorsers is concerned about a radical homosexual organization's imminent attack against traditional marriage, but a Christian political activist believes "gay" activists are beginning to realize that most Americans will not support "full-blown homosexual marriage."'

All that is setting aside the inaccuracy of the statement, since polls are showing that at least a plurality does approve equal marriage.

Talk about stories you could not possibly make up.

Hopefully, this will post to LJ eventually. Thanks to everyone who offered birthday wishes. I had a good day, although I worked because I'm saving vacation days for the end of the month, when Mr. M and I are going to Louisiana for a week. We'll be visiting M:TNG-1 and Halloween in New Orleans should be pretty interesting.

Such a very well-named organization.

This is a yarn shop near me. I don't know whether to thank them or curse them for feeding my interest in knitting. They are amazingly nice, and I would never have figured out how to graft the toes of a sock if one of the salespeople hadn't shown me very patiently after I happened to mention I was having trouble. There are always people sitting around knitting and chatting. And there's usually some incredibly complex and lovely project lying casually on a table, giving me an inferiority complex. It's all very cozy and inevitably makes me wonder what I'm doing in a place like that.

They sell online, if you're interested in expensive but gorgeous material.

You say that you were approached by a woman who told you her daughter became mentally retarded after getting the Gardasil vaccine.

So? My daughter graduated summa cum laude and was accepted into Phi Beta Kappa shortly after getting the same vaccine.

I'd try to explain why some thing one person told you with no evidence of cause and effect is not a reason to scare parents shitless about something that can protect their kids. But either you already know that and are using this for political gain, or you are incapable of understanding.

I've been able to pick up reading on DW and LJ lately, so I don't feel too embarrassed about starting to post again. Even when I don't have anything to say, I've enjoyed reading fandom posts and seeing that some people are still out there playing. It's a little bit like old times, although with a much smaller population. I know people have left for Facebook and other shores they find sunnier, but I still prefer this format.

My mom has had some health problems, and so have I, but things are looking up right now. Besides, it's Fall, which means the temps are frequently under 100F and that always cheers me up, at least until we hit the sub-zeroes later in the year.

I don't have huge news. Let's see: I lost some crockery this weekend when a shelf gave way and I am seriously considering having my ancient kitchen cabinets replaced. Mr. M and I are planning to go to New Orleans around Halloween. My baby has started her last year of college and my firstborn is now in the classroom as a teacher, which means that without tuition payments looming I may be able to afford the new cabinets.

Sorry, that's all I've got.

I lost my cell phone, which was not much of a disaster, because I was due for an upgrade. I got a new one today, and I spent over a half hour playing around to see what it could do before it occurred to me to find out how to use it to make a phone call.

We're getting more snow.

M:TNG-2 is back at school.

I've been trying to get caught up with LJ every few days, although I haven't commented much.

The following items in the Murchison residence broke last week:

Furnace
Garage door
Garbage disposal
Cable box

All is now fixed except the garbage disposal.

Work is actually getting slightly less busy. Of course, by typing this, I'm jinxing it.

It is a cruel jest to say to a bootless man that he should lift himself up by his own bootstraps. It is even worse to tell a man to lift himself up by his own bootstraps when somebody is standing on the boot.

-Martin Luther King, Jr.

How did I miss the news that there's a new date for the end of the world? It's May 21, 2011, so I'm glad I scheduled my vacation in April. Really, I thought we had until 2012. I saw a movie about it.

Ah, well, perhaps God will reschedule, as he has so many times. He may be omnipotent, but he's also almighty bad at keeping appointments.

Stolen from just about everyone:

Copy and Paste if you have enjoyed the blessing of meeting people online that you never would have met any other way.

This is my end of the year shout out to the many friends I have never been in the same room with but who have inspired, amused, comforted, encouraged, and touched me in so many ways.

And, of course, there are those of you who I met online and later came to know in person. You have all enriched my life.

I posted a story in the latest round of Seasonal Spuffy.

Title: Buffy and the Dalek Slayers
Author: Miss Murchison
Rating: PG and only that for one vague joke
Word count: About 4000

Summary: This is a sequel to Who's the Doctor? and Where's the Doctor?, my previous BtVS/Doctor Who crossovers.

This one involves the Seventh Doctor and his companion Ace. Chapter One is here.